Tag Archives: Regrets

Best Friends

Life is short. Live it. 

T

***

I’m on Michigan Av

Sitting on the steps

which lead to

The Chicago Art Institute.

There is a lovely

young lady playing her violin

and with each string

that she strokes with her bow,

I feel as if she’s revealing

my heart’s hymn.

Her music speaks of  truths

and broken hearts,

happy times and lovers’ quarrels,

summer warmth and the cold wind…

As the wind plays with my hair

and the sun kisses my skin

my thoughts lead to a tale

I once heard

about this boy and a girl.

They knew each other since her birth,

Best friends from the beginning,

chosen by one another for life.

He attended her wedding

and she danced at his.

They saw each other through

the heartaches prior to then,

all the difficulties of their marriages.

Even their kids grew up to be

best friends,

played together on the street,

sat side by side in grades two and three.

And when she got sick,

he went to her and stayed by her side,

despite the raised eyebrows

of her husband and his wife.

One day, close to her end,

he was sitting beside her,

and holding her hand,

she opened her eyes and asked

“Why do you remain here, by my side?”

He raised her hand to his lips,

as a tear rolled down his cheek.

She waited for him to speak.

When he gathered enough courage to talk,

he raised his eyes to meet her puzzled gaze and said

“I’ve loved you my entire life.

You are my best friend.

Here you lie, fighting for your life,

as I sit helpless with one huge regret.”

He paused there

while she caught her breath and his tears fell.

He spoke again,

much softer this time and said

“My whole life,

I longed for you to be mine.

I was too scared to tell you how I feel,

and now that you’re here I think of

how different both of our lives may have been

if I had just told you that

from the very beginning.”

She too was crying now

trying hard to catch her breath

for the words he just spoke

touched her to her core.

They sat in silence for a while,

looking into each other’s eyes.

When she finally spoke,

her voice was clear.

“I too have also loved you from the very beginning.

My whole life I longed to be with you

but I too was scared

to speak my truth.

My time is running out

and we can’t go back to change anything

so instead of regretting the time we didn’t spend,

Let’s enjoy our right now.

When I leave this place and our kids are of age,

I want you to sit them down and tell them this story

so that they don’t repeat our mistakes.”

He nodded his head

for he couldn’t speak.

He couldn’t believe that he spoke his truth

at the age of forty-three.

Almost half of his life passed in fear and now

it’s too late

because his best friend is leaving.

As they stayed in her final moments,

before she closed her eyes,

he whispered

“I love you”

in her ear

over a thousand times.

And as her breathing got shallower

his voice became louder.

She opened her eyes

one last time,

said “I love you”

and let out

her final sigh.


Could Have…Should Have…Didn’t…

I think I’ve replayed Adele’s “Someone Like You” a million times…watched the video a bunch of times too…she filmed it Paris, just in case you didn’t pay attention or know…the city of love… Well, love is created between two people and obviously it doesn’t just happen in the city of lights. But people often have regrets which are misplaced in the place(s) of their hearts and mind they haven’t explored or felt. So this poem is about that – misplaced regrets…of a girl or a guy.

I’ve held on to it for a while but feel good about sharing it with you now.

One love,

T

******

“I wish I could have loved you better”

is what he said to me

on that day we

bumped into one another

randomly

on the street.

And often,

I look back and wonder

what he really meant,

because, to me,

he did love me,

in his own way….

well…

except for the times he

seemed to have escaped

the circle of where we placed

our love and then…

and then he became

a different man…

I didn’t recognize him anymore

so I just assumed that

he escaped US forever.

I mean, he LEFT without

a real good-bye

or an explanation of why

he couldn’t just stay…

but I took that to mean

that he just wasn’t

the right one FOR ME

so when he said to me

“I wish I loved you differently”

I thought –

“Would that have made a difference really?

Or would we have just prolonged the inevitable?”

I actually don’t want to know.

What once was

but couldn’t remain

is something which now

I see as

a reason.

It was a reason for

MY change.

I’ve become the woman who

I’ve always wanted to be –

one who is honest and real,

a woman who stands in her own integrity –

And not because

that’s who you made me

but that’s who

I’ve worked hard to be.

So all the

could haves,

should haves,

or would haves

aren’t relevant anymore

‘cuz the woman who

you ran into on the street that day

may not have even allowed

you to talk to her

that long time ago

let alone have

let you into her world.

I guess that sounds

a little cold

but I’ve become better

and you still seem to be standing

in that same place

where you stood before.

I’m not gullible now

to your

“I wish I could have loved you more”

which of course,

I’ve heard before…

my most honest

and realest reply,

which I don’t have to give

would be:

“When your right one comes along,

don’t shy away from loving her more.

Much more…than you were ever

able to love me.”

*****

You can watch Adele’s video here:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hLQl3WQQoQ0


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