Category Archives: grace

BIG Questions

 

There are a few big truths I’ve learned about being human thus far:

Understanding ones Self allows an understanding of others.

Trusting ones Self fully allows one to trust another.

Empowering ones Self allows not just the ability to empower others but to practice self-esteem and speak one’s truth.

A lot of these lessons I understood through my own reflective practice, though I’ve read and heard many teachers hand these priceless jewels out in their writings and lectures. Of course you can only fully understand something if you sit with it in reflection, practice and experience it.

I have come to understand that a reflective practice is vital in our growth however I only learned to ask the big questions, questions which served me and my growth, in the last year. These questions stem from an awareness and a big truth which is that nothing anyone ever does is about us but is an extension of the space in their Self in which they dwell. However, asking why someone does, says or thinks something, is not a question which serves us or helps us grow.

The only place you can surely settle into and, if you choose to do so, learn intimately is your own Self. Immersing ones Self into the depths of your soul or spirit, whether through a meditative practice or a reflective practice or through creative expressions etc, is a sure way to centre oneSelf. However, to navigate these spaces, even through different practices,  one must ask questions which serve you.

I have learned that some of the big questions which serve your growth include:

Why do I think this or think in this way?

Why do I feel this way about an event?

Why did I say this during a specific event?

Why was this my internal reaction to an event?

Why do I believe this?

What is it about this person/place/situation that makes me feel the way I do?

One of my favourite teachers, Caroline Myss, would say that these questions are not small but “they’re great big huge and you cannot possibly answer them that quickly.” I feel that the list of questions above are good starting points for reflection.

In my own reflective practice, asking these questions has provided a lot of clarity for me, but more importantly, they have acted as an anchor to my centre, my true Self. These questions have also brought up inner work I wasn’t aware I needed to do. I found that awareness painful at times, but the more I’ve done it, the easier it has been to be centred even during events that have in the past taken me far away from that space.

Our humanity dictates our imperfections, and thereby demands courage to grow, learn, evolve, allow, and ultimately, to fly. To me, the greatest representation of freedom are birds in the sky – they can fly anywhere, see things from different altitudes and perspectives, experience different horizons – and I view finding one’s centre to be like a bird in flight, gliding across the sky, without attachment, free and prepared to experience anything, anyone, in any weather. For me, dwelling in big questions, objectively and without judgement, has allowed my own freedom of flight and, so far, the views have been illuminating.

Wishing you love, light and a soaring flight,

T

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A Great Story

Blessed are those who see their Self reflected in the eyes of another. Even more blessed are those who truly see each other.

– T.

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Cusco, Peru 2017. Photo © of T.Nikic

THE MEETING

She doesn’t go to bars and she’s never been to this one. The bar she has entered is filled with magic. She’s failed to connect with the acquaintance she’s spending the evening with, so she orders a magic potion to drink. No sugar added.

He had been at a party with his best friend who was visiting him. He doesn’t remember how it happened, but he ended up sitting on a stool at the bar next to her. Neither of them knew how long they’d been there when he turned to her and asked, “Have you read about this magic?” At that exact moment they entered into a creative space of infinite possibilities where they could go anywhere that night together.

When she walked away from him she wondered if she met HIM. The next day when he asked to see her again, she wanted to tell him that she wasn’t ready, that it was too soon. But she didn’t. “How could I not be ready?” she wondered, “I’ve been waiting to meet someone like him my entire life”. Instead, she continued the dance of texting and late night phone calls, and pushed him away, slowly at first, but it turned into a cruel ordeal soon thereafter.

THE GREETING

Fast-forward about six months. They’ve not spoken nor seen each other. Perhaps they remained curious, but no contact was made. She travels to a far away land to heal, for she thinks that the reason she pushed him away is deep, and she needs help to do so. She drinks a healing potion three times. The first time she drinks it, she releases all that has been holding her back her entire life. The second time she drinks it, he comes to her, joyful and smiling, wanting to be with her. Happily, they embrace for a long time. She tells him she has to finish her work but that she will return to him. Reluctantly, he leaves her. The third time she drinks the potion, she becomes a bird and flies to the mountain peak. It becomes official then – she has healed and is ready for the next elevation.

THE DREAM

When she returns home, she reaches out to him. His reply suggests that he is unsure or uninterested. She doesn’t push. He visits her in a dream a few weeks later. They are together but there are many people watching them. One of the walls of the room of their bedroom is actually a stage. There is a play going on and he seems interested in watching it. She feels love because they are doing something together. She wakes up feeling hopeful.

THE FULFILLMENT

It’s been over five months since her healed self returned home and reached out to him. No contact and yet he visits her in yet another dream. In this dream, they are sitting around a dining room table, outside in a green garden with many flowers on a warm, sunny day. It feels like late spring. The people sitting around the table feel like her family, and he is sitting with her and laughing with them. He serves her breakfast – farmer’s market butter and honey spread lovingly on a piece of bread made with love. She never told him that was her favourite breakfast growing up. She is moved to tears. He smiles at her and she wakes up. Oh, the grace, blessings, love, she feels on a soul level when she opens her eyes that morning – he said goodbye to her so lovingly. She sends a sincere prayer of gratitude to him.

HER LESSON

His presence in her physical life was very short, yet he graced her with love that transcended the senses and reached her soul. He inspired her to heal. She learned that life is about allowing, not holding on. She is now flying.

The meeting of their souls was planned long before they saw each other, but their meeting started a new chapter in her life. A life of conscious commitment, to her Self, to honour her soul on every level, in every way, each and every moment, for the rest of her life.

The fairytale is over.


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