I walked up the stairs of my childhood,
And it was the first time that it made me sad.
The memories that they hold are beautiful…
They are the greatest treasures of my heart.
It is not my return to them which is driving my tears.
It is the fact that you’re no longer at the top of the stairs,
smiling and waiting for me.
I walk into the room I saw you last,
The room where you took your very last breath,
And I sob for all of that you meant to me and to us all…
I cry for all of those who you left.
For they didn’t understand you
Nor did they feel what I felt.
Your trust in me gave me strength
And it humbled me to my core.
It came from a place of unconditional love
A connection that was strong between us, very strong.
I wish I had seen you again…
At least once before your soul left your body.
To hug you and talk to you for a little while,
To spend a few hours…just a little bit of time.
Here I am now standing in the room you took your last breath
Praying that you knew how I really felt.
I stand here sending you my love,
Knowing that it’s not enough
As the tears keep falling down my face
And I can no longer run for comfort into your embrace.
To the best grandfather anyone could have,
Please visit me in my dreams sometime….
So I can tell you how much your love shaped me,
and all of that it meant.
So I can walk with you once more,
sit close to you or just hold your hand.
I know my tears won’t bring you back
But they fall every time you cross my mind.
I hope that you are at peace now…
As I know you’re watching over grandma.